The Adventures of Fox Staubest! - Part V
The President, en route back to Washington on Air Force One, is on the phone congratulating the captain of the space shuttle for a great flight just as it breaks through light cloud cover on its way to a routine landing at Edwards Air Force Base in California. After the pleasantries the President gets serious and asks to speak with Travis for a minute. But there’s a problem on the shuttle as Travis insists that it’s just not possible for him to unbuckle his seat belt until they’re safely docked at the terminal and the seat belt sign is turned off. The rest of the shuttle crew quickly obliges and helps straighten out the phone cord while passing the phone back to him.

The President tells the Secretary of State to go get him a popsickle out of the freezer, now! As soon as he walks away the President and Travis confer quietly. Air Force One banks over West Virginia. A pelican soars higher and higher. Its wings ache but the sun’s warmth is radiant in the cool high altitude air. Ralph the pelican is proud. For now he’s flying higher than any pelican has ever flown before. It’s quiet and cool with a few other birds flying far, far below. Oh look - Ralph spots another bird flying as high up as he is. It’s coming straight toward him and appears to have shiny feathers and square eyes up front. Not much of a beak though, and as it gets closer it sure looks bigger and bigger.

Travis hands the phone back forward as the Western US comes into view far below. The captain wants to resume their conversation but the President interrupts him - a call is coming in from Fox. The President says he’s gotta go, and hangs up.

Ralph the pelican suddenly realizes that the friendly giant bird coming straight at him isn’t slowing down. And even though it looks like it’s gliding effortlessly a loud rumbling noise is coming from its wings - straight ahead. At the last instant Ralph squawks, "Buh-gaeuckk!!" and dives just below Air Force One. He tumbles in the turbulence. As he falls his wings ache, he feels disoriented and tired. Confused, he manages to stabilize his descent while beginning the long glide back down to Earth.

Fox concludes his brief discussion with the President, "Chow, sir." He hangs up. Jorge sits there taking a nap. Gary is on the phone. Their flight will reach Portland soon. Jorge has a smile on his face, eyes closed in slumber.

Jorge stands below in the courtyard. His sword is sheathed, the feathers in his tall hat move gently in the light breeze. He takes the beautiful damsel with long black hair and a sly smile into his arms and says, "You are a beautiful flower and I have some extra time on my hands. Let me woo you with romantic words. Oh, your eyes (as he glances lower, then back up into her eyes) are like … very beautiful eyes. We must kiss." He draws Michelle closer.

Suddenly - on the balcony above, Daniel appears - sword in hand. His white ruffled shirt is from a different tailor than Jorge’s as the frilly cuffs almost completely cover his hands but the collar isn’t as high, but otherwise they are dressed in the same style: leather vests, tight leather pants, tall feathered hats, black boots and gleaming long swords. Daniel wipes fresh blood off his sword while suggesting rather loudly that the next man who says he’s dressed like a sissy with all of the frills and feathers will taste more of the same. Jorge sees Daniel and angrily snaps, "How dare you defile my dream with your lowly presence!" Daniel grabs hold of a rope with his free hand while climbing over the balcony railing, "Oh, how I have longed for this day! Will you fight like a man, or scamper away like one who is dressed like a sissy?" Both Daniel and Jorge glance back and forth and appear temporarily embarrassed at the suggestion but don’t notice anyone laughing at them. In fact the crowd of people whispers fearfully and quickly empties the courtyard below. Jorge releases Michelle and tells her to wait for him. She runs over to a nearby archway and waits.

Daniel jumps off the balcony and effortlessly glides down the rope. As he does so the other end of the rope lifts the blinds

in a nearby room. Jorge looks up and thinks he sees Gary in there with a notepad and pen in hand. Old Superman cartoons are playing on the TV and it looked like Gary was furiously taking notes. The blinds fall back down. Daniel lands in front of Jorge who swiftly draws his sword. "En Garde, monsieur!" "En Garde!" As they begin to battle Michelle picks up a bag of peanuts from a nearby street vendor. She tells the owner that no matter which one of them wins the winner will pay for it. She leans against the arch and opens the bag of peanuts. Daniel battles hard and fast pushing Jorge back. Jorge defends while backing up, looking for an opening. Daniel errs with a thrust when he should have parried. Jorge takes the initiative and begins forcing Daniel to give ground. Daniel looks worried. Jorge decides to up the ante. He quickly grabs two 3 Musketeers candy bars from a vendor’s stand and tosses one to Daniel. Daniel grabs the candy bar with his free hand. Both bite off the ends of the wrappers and spit them out. The vendor protests, "Hey!" Jorge answers that no matter which one of them wins she (pointing back to Michelle) will pay for it. Michelle looks up startled. She’s chewing and now looks angry. She throws down the bag of peanuts, puts her hands on her hips, and swallows.

As Daniel and Jorge begin chewing their first bite the sword fight slows. They stand in one place now. They try hard to concentrate but chewing at the same time makes it more difficult. Michelle stops just behind Jorge and begins shaking his shoulder. Her voice is deeper than he remembered. "Jorge, Jorge…" Jorge is stumbling. But Daniel appears to do no better as he loses his balance too. A flower pot falls off a balcony above. Everything is shaking, maybe it’s an earthquake! Michelle shakes him harder; he can barely hold onto his sword, "Jorge, we’re landing in 5 minutes…. Hey, Jorge…."

"Whaa-, huh?…." Jorge wakes up and sees Fox standing over him. Fox turns to walk away. Jorge sits up and looks around. Gary is in the background. His cell phone, which he never uses but always carries around is beside him. He’s using the private jet’s phone and is evidently speaking with his wife, "Yeah, sometimes when I’m at work I feel like Clark Kent. And nobody knows what I’m really like…." Jorge thinks that he may have misheard this and rubs his eyes for a moment. Fox sits down to update him. Fox hands Jorge a cup of coffee, "The President said that the Consulate-General will be taking care of the nuisance. But for the evil Dr. Rash Behindend - world leaders are paralyzed with fear and just hoping and praying that we’ll be able to stop him." Jorge replies that after work tomorrow he’ll do some more research into the problem. In the background Jorge overhears Gary saying something into the phone about his billowing red cape and flying underneath the Golden Gate Bridge. He looks at Fox who doesn’t seem to have noticed. Jorge takes a gulp of coffee and tries to clear his mind.

Meanwhile also in the skies but far away, Dr. Rash Behindend is in his own private black jet, silently returning to his secret island base in the South Pacific. Rash quietly grades a few papers and answers some e-mail using his laptop.